for the harvest

coming back from UR, I can safely say that my convictions for missions have been strengthened mightily.
it's so amazing how I signed up for UR with absolutely no hesitation, regretted the hasty decision, and was able to see why God led me to attending this year.

for quite some time now, I've grown to have a heart for thailand--especially for the women&children affected heavily by prostitution.
strange as it seems, my heart is torn by the stories that I hear&the images that enter my mind when I think about the country.
the tears that flow down my cheeks whenever I even think about the people who desperately need God surprise even myself.
but as I continue to realize just how much these lives could be changed through salvation, I find reason for my weeping.
just the fact that these souls are chained by not only sexual slavery but also by spiritual bondage is so tragic, and my whole heart aches&desires to be a part of their lives.

to be perfectly honest, it does scare me at times to even think about stepping into a country where such acts are so acknowledged and accepted.
however, I have full faith that God will take these petty fears away from my heart and replace them with love&great compassion.

everything that was related to missions during UR reminded me of how my knowledge of what was going on in thailand truly made me responsible to go out there and deliver souls to God and have Him work wonders.
every seminar and every sermon spurred me on more&more and ultimately left me so pumped and excited to go out there&give it all I've got in order to allow God to work through me.
as I felt even more convicted, I felt compelled to research on the country and it's history of prostitution and found so many facts that simply added to my urgency for missions.

I truly pray that I'll have a chance to go there and see for myself the tragedies that are occurring there on a regular basis.
if God be willing, I would absolutely love the chance to go there this summer.
but wherever he leads me ultimately for the summer, I will go and He will bless&provide--I'm sure of it.
prayer prayer prayer.

and on another note, i really love the song Everlasting God by New Life Worship.
it's an absolutely beautiful song&definitely on my repeat list.

wishful thinking

that would be so cool.
it would be like that one scrubs episode where the patient thinks everyone is part of her musical.
I'd say that was one of my favorite episodes of scrubs by far.
just a random thought.

on another note, as a sort of big hurrah for being done with finals, I stayed up until 430am this morning finishing up the entire season1 of arrested development.
I thought I was going to give up after watching like one episode, because I didn't think it'd be that funny.
but I was proven wrong, because that show is freaking hilarious.
and even though michael cera is like 13-14 in season1, he's still so uber cute.
I'd say right now, georgemichael&gob are on the top of my list :) cuties

I really wish he'd date someone else though.
that one girl is such a weirdey.
and I don't know why some sites say she's 32 and some say she's 22.
strange I tell ya.

such great heights

it's kinda strange how I've had a falling out with all the tv shows I had a strong affinity for, such as gossipgirl&theoffice&thehills, but there has been one show that I continue to grow more&more in love with with every passing episode.
as you can guess from the title, that show is Chuck.

after watching season one at least three times from the beginning&continuing to survey the character of Chuck, I think I can say that I would love my future boyfriend/husband figure to have some of the qualities that he has.
he's so nerdy, but so cute at the same time.
I think I have a thing for nerds.

look how cute he and sarah are.


what a freaking cutie.

a well in a desert

despite the fact that I have about a million things to do, I decided to re-read one of my favorite books--
le petit prince.
if you haven't done so already, I highly suggest you read it, either in english or in french. or both.
not only is the artwork and the imagery beautiful, but the content&the meaning behind even the seemingly simple sentences also are absolutely stunning.
even though I've read this at least ten times, I always discover something new and profound each and every read.

in this particular reading, what caught my eye was the unconditional love that the little prince has for his rose and the unspoken requited love that she has for him.
the simply sweet relationship between the naive prince, who tends to her every need, and the proud flower, who secretly loves the prince more than even her magnificent self, is so heartwarming yet so very wistful to read.
the overwhelming sense of pride that we, as people, tend to have in order to protect ourselves from getting hurt or broken is so manifest in this rose, who is unable to lift the glass globe to vulnerably show her affections for the prince until the moment when they part.
the rose definitely has to be my favorite character; I think I find some attributes of her in myself.

and after looking at pictures on googleimages, I have decided that if I ever get a tattoo, it will be a scene from the book.
ie:




ce qui embellit le desert, dit le petit prince,
c'est qu'il cache un puits quelque part...

inklings & notions

listening to the soothing melodies of brooke fraser today while starting my essay, I came across one of her songs called hosea's wife.
the unique title struck me the most out of all her songs and so I took the liberty of looking up the lyrics and found them to be very beautiful and inspiring to say the least.


there is truth in little corners of our lives
there are hints of it in songs and children's eyes
it's familiar, like an ancient lullaby
what do i live for

we are Hosea's wife
we are squandering this life
using people like ladders and words like knives

if we've eyes to see
if we've ears to hear
to find it in our hearts and mouths the word that saves is near
shed that shallow skin
come and live again
leave all you were before
to believe is to begin

we are more than dust
that means something
that means something
we are more than just blood and emotions
inkling and notions
atoms on oceans

to believe is to begin


studying the old testament this quarter in one of my classes, I came to analyze hosea's life and God's command for him to marry a woman of whoredom to symbolize Israel's unfaithfulness to Him.
connecting it with this song, it's so amazing to see how often we fall into such a worldly lifestyle of shallow sin and forget what and for whom we live for.
we are called to be symbols of truth and light and yet we simply squander this life that has been deemed precious by our own Creator.
we must find it in our hearts to flee from this lifestyle.
and all we need to do is believe.

just some food for thought.
back to essay writing.